Fear


I recently finished my exams for the moore theological college correspondence course. I was doing OT 1 and Doctrine 1. It was tougher than I expected, but I’m glad it’s over and looking forward to the last 2 units for the preliminary theological certificate. Although I was quite apprehensive when I first started on this course, looking back I think I’ve learnt quite a bit. At the same time there are questions that the Bible doesn’t answer and it scares me. I understand that we have to trust in God’s character and love, but to have faith is something that I lack. Or perhaps it’s more accurate to say that my faith goes in cycles? Up and down.

Anyway, as someone who has a brother with Downs Syndrome, I have always wondered if people who don’t have the mental capacity to understand God and to accept Him as Lord and Saviour would go to heaven. Being brought up in a Christian home, my brother has always gone to church with the family and he seems to really enjoy worship and sings and talks to God all the time. He is slowly understanding a bit more about God, but I guess it’s in no way similar to how we understand. So yes, as I was studying for Doctrine 1 I came across this:

The bible is reticent about the situation of those who never heard of Christ and those who die in infancy or are mentally incapable of human relationships. It is perfectly clear that no human religion can save; if eternal life is to come, it must be through Christ; he is the unique saviour; all other religious activity reflects idolatry and blindness of the human heart. It is also clear that as the word of God spreads into the world it never encounters ‘innocent’ people, who do not need to saved. We must assume the lostness of humanity outside of Christ, and can believe that, if he pleases, he can bring people to himself through Christ by the work of his Spirit without our knowledge or intervention. Beyond such an observation it is not safe to go.

After reading that, I just started crying. The uncertainty and fear the grips me. Selfishly I would rather my brother enter into Christs’ kingdom rather than me. But no, it is not I that chooses but God in his perfect will and love who determines what will happen. Still I wish there was an answer or at least something I could hold onto and believe.

I do believe, help me overcome my unbelief!

In other news, my quiet time took a bit of a backseat as exams came and school started. Now I’m trying to get through Ephesians. It seems like a difficult book but at the same time I do need to be familiar with it for the next round of exams. Will be doing Ephesians and Promise to Fulfillment. Hurray!

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